I swear the people that work in Langley's daycare centers believe that they have an armchair M.D. Ziggy gets a call today after lunch, saying that MiniZiggy has pink-eye and that we need to go get him right now, take him to the doctor, get him some meds, and bring him back, since pink-eye isn't contagious. Um......ok, I have a diploma in medicine........PINK EYE IS VERY CONTAGIOUS!!!!!! And just because the child has a cold, it doesn't warrant a national emergency that he's dying. I am experienced, I know when he needs to go to the doctor. I really can't stand caregivers who think they know better than parents. Peeves me to no end........
So, Cadillac and I are driving a cop car around base today(on a test drive), and I mention that I want to see the new jets that are on base. Unless you've been living under a rock, you know what jet I am talking about, so I feel no need to mention the name. So, the afore mentioned Cadillac whips around to the flight line area so I can see the new jet. Cool points awarded to the boss!! Sidebar - the jet wasn't out on the tarmac like it usually is, but hey, he got cool points for taking me to see it. Way to get on the good side of your troop!
Well, I had better get off of here and make myself useful and find some papers that I have misplaced, and I REALLY need to find. Sleep is also calling.......
Monday, January 31, 2005
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Rain rain go away.......
Well, it's another dreary Sunday. MiniZiggy has a cold, and is fussy here a good bit. We finally got him into the on-base daycare, and I am so glad, as it will cut a good bit of time out of our daily commute.
Did the taxes the other day, and we'll be getting enough back in order to pay off my 4 wheeler. One less bill to pay, I am not complaining. I don't like to be in debt alot. We have plenty of friends who seem to thrive on being in debt, and I am so glad that we aren't in that boat.
I bought tires for my car last weekend, that was a cool $470. But hey, I was going to get them anyways.
I painted the upstairs hallway, and I finished MiniZiggy's crocheted blanket, so I have accomplished much this weekend. I always like to get tasks completed, it's a nice thing to be able to say that I finished something. I still have other things I want to do and get done, but I am trying to do them in moderation.
I lost my cell phone, so I need to call up the Sprint people and get that taken care of. Maybe I'll get a neat new phone. Not that the one I had wasn't neat, I just don't like flip phones. What really sucks about this is that I had a bunch of phone numbers in that phone, and now they are all lost.
I am going to see if I can buy this late '60's Dodge Dart that sits in the parking lot across from where I work. It's been sitting in the same spot for months, and it never moves. I'd like to take it and rebuild it and fix it up and tool around town in it.
So my friend, CrazyGirl, has this job opportunity to go to Germany. Sounds awesome.......I'd go in a heartbeat. It's always nice to see other countries, experience the cultures, see a bit of history while you're there. I'm a history nut, so I'd have a ball in Germany.
Did the taxes the other day, and we'll be getting enough back in order to pay off my 4 wheeler. One less bill to pay, I am not complaining. I don't like to be in debt alot. We have plenty of friends who seem to thrive on being in debt, and I am so glad that we aren't in that boat.
I bought tires for my car last weekend, that was a cool $470. But hey, I was going to get them anyways.
I painted the upstairs hallway, and I finished MiniZiggy's crocheted blanket, so I have accomplished much this weekend. I always like to get tasks completed, it's a nice thing to be able to say that I finished something. I still have other things I want to do and get done, but I am trying to do them in moderation.
I lost my cell phone, so I need to call up the Sprint people and get that taken care of. Maybe I'll get a neat new phone. Not that the one I had wasn't neat, I just don't like flip phones. What really sucks about this is that I had a bunch of phone numbers in that phone, and now they are all lost.
I am going to see if I can buy this late '60's Dodge Dart that sits in the parking lot across from where I work. It's been sitting in the same spot for months, and it never moves. I'd like to take it and rebuild it and fix it up and tool around town in it.
So my friend, CrazyGirl, has this job opportunity to go to Germany. Sounds awesome.......I'd go in a heartbeat. It's always nice to see other countries, experience the cultures, see a bit of history while you're there. I'm a history nut, so I'd have a ball in Germany.
Friday, January 28, 2005
Another week down
Thankfully this week is over. Ever have one of those weeks that it seems no matter what you touch, it turns out a mess? That was my week this week. Just couldn't do much of anything right.
So I have the upstairs hallway's first coat of paint on the wall. Go me! Here in a bit I will go over it with the second coat. I feel as though I have accomplished alot already!!!!
Ziggy may have to work tomorrow night. Boo, hiss! I miss him when he's not home with us on the weekends. Call me sappy, but I love being with my husband.
So I have the upstairs hallway's first coat of paint on the wall. Go me! Here in a bit I will go over it with the second coat. I feel as though I have accomplished alot already!!!!
Ziggy may have to work tomorrow night. Boo, hiss! I miss him when he's not home with us on the weekends. Call me sappy, but I love being with my husband.
Tuesday, January 25, 2005
A few thoughts on love, and maybe a story...
An internet friend, CrazyGirl, was talking about her current relationship, and it made me do some reflection myself. She was talking about true love, the 'meant to be' stuff, all that. Now, I don't buy that people are destined or fated or anything like that, and the little story I'll tell is why, but we'll get to that in a minute. I fully believe that people come into and go out of your life for different reasons. To learn things, to tell you things, all that bit.
Soulmates was a word that has been brought up in my past a couple times. At a couple points in time, I believed in it. The whole shebang, twin flame, only one for you, only one that could truly make you happy, blase blase bullshit, right? Well, I have been burned not once, but twice.. on the whole 'soulmates' bit. The first was a friend in high school who was so hung up on me(he's Scout's godfather, actually), that he took about 2 years talking me into believing we were 'soulmates' and needed to be together. Don't get me wrong this guy was a great guy, hell, he was one of my best friends. But for the life of me, I couldn't make myself see him as anything other than a friend/brother. For the sake of the person I loved so much as a friend, I tried to believe him. But in the end, I just couldn't agree that we were meant to be, all that. So, I lost my best friend in the whole ordeal.
The second one was Other. I knew from minute one that my life was going to be different from knowing this man. Yea. Different is a good word for that. I met Other at work. According to him, Other took a liking to me from the beginning. Told me he'd seen me in a dream about 6 months prior and that he knew I was going to be someone significant in his life. I should have ended the whole conversation then and run like hell. At the time, I was engaged to marry Ziggy. Dumbass me fell in love with Other. he passionate Romeo and Juliet, can't breathe in their presence type of thing. My emotions ran from one extreme to the other with this man. I was either high on the fact I loved him, or totally ready to scratch his eyes out for pissing me off. If you've read anything else I've posted about Other, you'll know that he and I have had a most rocky relationship. And I'll leave it at that as to background on my relationship with Other. Long story short, I was asked to choose between the two men, Ziggy and Other. It's alwasy been said that every girl has her 'bad boy'. Other was mine. The differences between Other and Ziggy are night and day. Literally. Even to appearance. Other is tall, dark hair, dark eyes, Elvis-esque looks, larger than life. Ziggy is the blonde haired, blue eyed baseball jock that is every woman's friend, but was never the boyfriend. The boy next door, essentially. And I had to choose between the two. Now, Ziggy and I had a great thing going, and for some reason I still can't explain, I tossed it aside one night and decided on Other. The day after Christmas, if I recall right. Weirdest week of my life. Here I was, thinking on the one hand that I'd done the right thing. Gave up a decent, loving man for the person that I was 'destined' for before I was ever born. And on the other hand, I had a HUGE hole in me that nothing but Ziggy could fill. I was lost without my best friend. Only one thing to be done-get rid of Other and ask Ziggy if we could get back together and go on like we'd planned. So, I did. And by some miracle that I still thank God for to this day, Ziggy came back to me.
Now, to make sense of that mess, here's what I couldn't get straight in my head about Other being my soulmate. Everything with Other was a fight, for the most part. Getting him to talk to me past the mundane small talk, deciding to be together for that one week, anything and everything was like pulling teeth with that man. We fought CONSTANTLY. I couldn't understand why Fate(or who/whatever decides that folks are 'meant' or whatnot) would bring two people together, and then make it so damned hard to be even the basics of friends. That's just cruel in my book. Also, if there's only one for me, then why would Ziggy and I fall in love, get married, have our life together just as well as if it was Other instead? I see too many loopholes in the whole 'soulmate' gig. More than I want to mention. But I'm sure you get the idea.
Now, yes, I believe that some people just 'get' other people really well. Chemistry, intuition, whatever you want to call it. But I don't believe in soulmates. Fate, maybe. But not soulmates. Not when your whole relationship with the one that's supposedly your soulmate does nothing but bring pain and sadness to you. I can't believe that Fate, or God, or who/whatever would be that cruel to people.
So yes, I had that massively passionate on fire love in my life once. But you know, normal love, based on a solid friendship, is what will last for my lifetime as the person I make my life with. And that was Ziggy. And I wouldn't change it now for all the world.
Soulmates was a word that has been brought up in my past a couple times. At a couple points in time, I believed in it. The whole shebang, twin flame, only one for you, only one that could truly make you happy, blase blase bullshit, right? Well, I have been burned not once, but twice.. on the whole 'soulmates' bit. The first was a friend in high school who was so hung up on me(he's Scout's godfather, actually), that he took about 2 years talking me into believing we were 'soulmates' and needed to be together. Don't get me wrong this guy was a great guy, hell, he was one of my best friends. But for the life of me, I couldn't make myself see him as anything other than a friend/brother. For the sake of the person I loved so much as a friend, I tried to believe him. But in the end, I just couldn't agree that we were meant to be, all that. So, I lost my best friend in the whole ordeal.
The second one was Other. I knew from minute one that my life was going to be different from knowing this man. Yea. Different is a good word for that. I met Other at work. According to him, Other took a liking to me from the beginning. Told me he'd seen me in a dream about 6 months prior and that he knew I was going to be someone significant in his life. I should have ended the whole conversation then and run like hell. At the time, I was engaged to marry Ziggy. Dumbass me fell in love with Other. he passionate Romeo and Juliet, can't breathe in their presence type of thing. My emotions ran from one extreme to the other with this man. I was either high on the fact I loved him, or totally ready to scratch his eyes out for pissing me off. If you've read anything else I've posted about Other, you'll know that he and I have had a most rocky relationship. And I'll leave it at that as to background on my relationship with Other. Long story short, I was asked to choose between the two men, Ziggy and Other. It's alwasy been said that every girl has her 'bad boy'. Other was mine. The differences between Other and Ziggy are night and day. Literally. Even to appearance. Other is tall, dark hair, dark eyes, Elvis-esque looks, larger than life. Ziggy is the blonde haired, blue eyed baseball jock that is every woman's friend, but was never the boyfriend. The boy next door, essentially. And I had to choose between the two. Now, Ziggy and I had a great thing going, and for some reason I still can't explain, I tossed it aside one night and decided on Other. The day after Christmas, if I recall right. Weirdest week of my life. Here I was, thinking on the one hand that I'd done the right thing. Gave up a decent, loving man for the person that I was 'destined' for before I was ever born. And on the other hand, I had a HUGE hole in me that nothing but Ziggy could fill. I was lost without my best friend. Only one thing to be done-get rid of Other and ask Ziggy if we could get back together and go on like we'd planned. So, I did. And by some miracle that I still thank God for to this day, Ziggy came back to me.
Now, to make sense of that mess, here's what I couldn't get straight in my head about Other being my soulmate. Everything with Other was a fight, for the most part. Getting him to talk to me past the mundane small talk, deciding to be together for that one week, anything and everything was like pulling teeth with that man. We fought CONSTANTLY. I couldn't understand why Fate(or who/whatever decides that folks are 'meant' or whatnot) would bring two people together, and then make it so damned hard to be even the basics of friends. That's just cruel in my book. Also, if there's only one for me, then why would Ziggy and I fall in love, get married, have our life together just as well as if it was Other instead? I see too many loopholes in the whole 'soulmate' gig. More than I want to mention. But I'm sure you get the idea.
Now, yes, I believe that some people just 'get' other people really well. Chemistry, intuition, whatever you want to call it. But I don't believe in soulmates. Fate, maybe. But not soulmates. Not when your whole relationship with the one that's supposedly your soulmate does nothing but bring pain and sadness to you. I can't believe that Fate, or God, or who/whatever would be that cruel to people.
So yes, I had that massively passionate on fire love in my life once. But you know, normal love, based on a solid friendship, is what will last for my lifetime as the person I make my life with. And that was Ziggy. And I wouldn't change it now for all the world.
Double decker exhaustion
I don't know what the deal is lately, but I seem to wake up tired, run just fine all day like there's no part of me that's tired, and on the way home it's like I got hit with a Mack truck. Exhaustion just slaps me down for the count. It happened today as well......Got about 3/4 of the way home and all I wanted to do was sleep. Fortunately for me, I wasn't the one driving.
Scout's birthday went off fairly well. We went to see Elektra, and all I can say is that it was better than Daredevil, which bit. On the whole, a decent day. I am starting to feel old, as Scout is now 9...........MiniZiggy will be 1 in October.....I will be 28 in September.......ugh, I am getting old.
Scout's birthday went off fairly well. We went to see Elektra, and all I can say is that it was better than Daredevil, which bit. On the whole, a decent day. I am starting to feel old, as Scout is now 9...........MiniZiggy will be 1 in October.....I will be 28 in September.......ugh, I am getting old.
Monday, January 24, 2005
Home on a Monday
It's Scout's 9th birthday. So I let him ditch school and do whatever he wants today. we are supposed to go to a movie, but I'm not sure if he remembers this or not. He went to WalMart yesterday and spent all the money he got for Christmas and his birthday on toys. Like the child didn't already have enough toys, but whatever, his money, not mine.
I have my homework for this week done, so I can do pretty much whatever I want after work this week. I have paint for MiniZiggy's room, but I can't decide between that and cleaning up mine and Ziggy's room. I need to atleast get the laundry handled.
It is massively cold today, like it was yesterday. And no amount of my cranking up the heat seems to help. It's 19 degrees outside!!! Way too freaking cold!!!!!!
I also need to finish the taxes today. that refund is going to help out nicely on bills.
Well, I had better go and make breakfast....
I have my homework for this week done, so I can do pretty much whatever I want after work this week. I have paint for MiniZiggy's room, but I can't decide between that and cleaning up mine and Ziggy's room. I need to atleast get the laundry handled.
It is massively cold today, like it was yesterday. And no amount of my cranking up the heat seems to help. It's 19 degrees outside!!! Way too freaking cold!!!!!!
I also need to finish the taxes today. that refund is going to help out nicely on bills.
Well, I had better go and make breakfast....
Saturday, January 22, 2005
Home with the babies
Ok, Scout's not a baby, but you get the idea. Ziggy's at work all night, yet again. Gotta be there incase a snowflake hits the ground, which it's too warm for that anyways, so he's basically not doing much at work.
So I painted the dining room, finally. And I got the paint for my bedroom, MiniZiggy's bedroom, and I got an extra gallon for the stairway and upstairs hall. So I have my work cut out for me for a few weeks.
I always have so much I want to accomplish on the weekends, and somehow I never feel like I've gotten very much of it done.
I don't know what's wrong with me lately, I don't totally feel like ME. I get upset easily, I feel a bit clingy. Ziggy is always so easy going and happy go lucky, and I feel like a nervous wreck most of the time lately. I'm not PMSing, I don't have that excuse. It's like my brain has decided to function like there's two minds, and they don't agree with each other. I hate indecision, even more so in myself, so this is really messing with me.
Also, I am finding it harder and harder to communicate with Ziggy. Workin opposite shifts doesn't help with that, either. It is almost as though when we lived in Alaska, we didn't have so much to worry about, and therefore we didn't have tension or anything. Or maybe we're just so different that things are really starting to show like that. I don't know.Ziggy doesn't like me telling things about our relationship, so I should probably stop now.
So I painted the dining room, finally. And I got the paint for my bedroom, MiniZiggy's bedroom, and I got an extra gallon for the stairway and upstairs hall. So I have my work cut out for me for a few weeks.
I always have so much I want to accomplish on the weekends, and somehow I never feel like I've gotten very much of it done.
I don't know what's wrong with me lately, I don't totally feel like ME. I get upset easily, I feel a bit clingy. Ziggy is always so easy going and happy go lucky, and I feel like a nervous wreck most of the time lately. I'm not PMSing, I don't have that excuse. It's like my brain has decided to function like there's two minds, and they don't agree with each other. I hate indecision, even more so in myself, so this is really messing with me.
Also, I am finding it harder and harder to communicate with Ziggy. Workin opposite shifts doesn't help with that, either. It is almost as though when we lived in Alaska, we didn't have so much to worry about, and therefore we didn't have tension or anything. Or maybe we're just so different that things are really starting to show like that. I don't know.Ziggy doesn't like me telling things about our relationship, so I should probably stop now.
Blast from the past
I hardly ever check my membership on Classmates.com. So what possessed me to check it the other day, I will never know. Come to find out, Scout's Godfather had been looking for me. We have started emailing back and forth, and I'm happy to learn that he's settled down with a nice woman and has a family now. It's weird how things work out sometimes.
Ziggy is supposed to work the night shift, yet again, tonight, so I will be home with the kids. It's not so bad, really, I guess. I am trying to get the house cleaned and squared away, as it's still in a bit of upheaval from moving.
Driving down the highway after work yesterday, I am chatting with Ziggy on my cell phone. Luckily Ziggy was on the same highway. I blew out a tire after hitting something in the road. So, my day today will be dominated by finding reasonably prices tires for a BMW.
Ziggy is supposed to work the night shift, yet again, tonight, so I will be home with the kids. It's not so bad, really, I guess. I am trying to get the house cleaned and squared away, as it's still in a bit of upheaval from moving.
Driving down the highway after work yesterday, I am chatting with Ziggy on my cell phone. Luckily Ziggy was on the same highway. I blew out a tire after hitting something in the road. So, my day today will be dominated by finding reasonably prices tires for a BMW.
Thursday, January 20, 2005
Let it Snow!!!
It's supposed to dump a couple inches here tonight. I really hope it does, cause I feel no motivation to go to work tomorrow. I'm feeling a bit lazy, I suppose.
Ziggy is all pysched about this trip to his home state. He was talking to me tonight about buying tickets, what money he wants to use for it, etc. Here's the funny thing. And I am not so sure that he realizes this, either.........if you wait to buy the tickets until right before you leave, YOU PAY MORE!!!! I can't say that it's not my money, because, well, it sorta is, as the account is a joint account. I just don't want to be rolling pennies for gas money because that money paid for plane tickets, you know? I'm not cheap, I'm just worried about paying bills while he's paying for plane tickets.
So I'm at work today, and it's the end of the whopping 4 hour shift I pulled, and I'm talking to the shop boss, let's call him Kermit the Frog. So Kermit and I are talking, and I'm giving him the update on where I am with a certain vehicle(as we have a night shift that can finish off things for us if it's not done by the time we get off), and he says,'So what I'm hearing is that you were the only one who got anything done today, am I right?' I tell him that I saw other people working, too, and he repeats that I'm the only one that got anything done today. That kinda made me feel good. Then the civilian that I work for is bragging to the big boss over the whole flight about how I'm working, how my training is going, etc. I'm not used to compliments, but it made me feel good.
Ziggy is all pysched about this trip to his home state. He was talking to me tonight about buying tickets, what money he wants to use for it, etc. Here's the funny thing. And I am not so sure that he realizes this, either.........if you wait to buy the tickets until right before you leave, YOU PAY MORE!!!! I can't say that it's not my money, because, well, it sorta is, as the account is a joint account. I just don't want to be rolling pennies for gas money because that money paid for plane tickets, you know? I'm not cheap, I'm just worried about paying bills while he's paying for plane tickets.
So I'm at work today, and it's the end of the whopping 4 hour shift I pulled, and I'm talking to the shop boss, let's call him Kermit the Frog. So Kermit and I are talking, and I'm giving him the update on where I am with a certain vehicle(as we have a night shift that can finish off things for us if it's not done by the time we get off), and he says,'So what I'm hearing is that you were the only one who got anything done today, am I right?' I tell him that I saw other people working, too, and he repeats that I'm the only one that got anything done today. That kinda made me feel good. Then the civilian that I work for is bragging to the big boss over the whole flight about how I'm working, how my training is going, etc. I'm not used to compliments, but it made me feel good.
Late hours today.
You know, I really do enjoy it when snow hits an area that's totally not used to it. Then I don't have to be at work at insane hours of the morning, and can sleep in a bit. So today I don't have to be at work until noon. I'm loving this. Scout is out of school, so that's one less place I have to go to pick him up. Ziggy has to be at work at 3, so I may get him to watch the kids, rather than taking any of them to daycare.
So Cadillac and I did a bunch of paperwork yesterday, and it seems that I am not as far behind in my training as was previously thought. this is all kinds of a good thing. That means that I won't be in training for very much longer, and I can totally handle that.
I was working on our taxes the other night, and so far(I am lacking one piece of paper that needs to be put in) we are getting about 2,000 back. Which is cool, as we are planning on getting rid of a bill with that money. Gotta love having less bills to pay, right?
So Cadillac and I did a bunch of paperwork yesterday, and it seems that I am not as far behind in my training as was previously thought. this is all kinds of a good thing. That means that I won't be in training for very much longer, and I can totally handle that.
I was working on our taxes the other night, and so far(I am lacking one piece of paper that needs to be put in) we are getting about 2,000 back. Which is cool, as we are planning on getting rid of a bill with that money. Gotta love having less bills to pay, right?
Tuesday, January 18, 2005
Starch, Cadillac and a book
Being in the military keeps one thing in my life, that I'd really rather not deal with. Starch. So I buy a spray bottle, and I put my liquid starch in it, and I commence to spraying my uniform. I get these weird looking streaks all across the shirt. So much for the spray bottle, huh? No matter what I tried, I couldn't change the stream. Full adjustable my ass.
Cadillac and I had a nice chat today. It's nice having a boss that's more human than asshole. Makes work a little more livable.
Scout and I sat for over 2 hours in the Navy hospital, waiting to get his prescription refilled. 2 hours.....for a doc to say,' Yes, he has ADHD, yes he needs his meds, no he's not losing weight, ok, here you go.' UGH. I hate government agencies for this. Patients must arrive early, be seen well past their appointment time, and then wait forever to get a bottle filled. And heaven forbid if you are late to that appointment, they won't see you at all then.
It was suggested to me, at one point by Other, that I ought to write a book. I have been giving this much thought, and the story is really starting to form in my head. Pretty soon I will have to put it on paper and see what happens.
They are calling for snow this week, and I am almost eager for it to come. Snow cripples this area, whereas I am used to driving in it, and having to go to work in it. I have much here at home that I really need to get a jump on and get done. So, yes, some time home from work wouldn't be a bad thing for me.
Ziggy and I have a couple friends who are expecting girls.....it makes me long to have another baby, but I know that it's not a good idea right now. But I'd love to have a little girl to put bows in her hair, frilly socks and Mary Jane shoes on......
Speaking of having another child, Cadillac and I were talking about my next 2 years in the military, as my contract is up in 2 years. Right now I have so many goals, that I am not sure how to compile them all so that they will mesh when I want them to. I want to get as much of my degree done as possible while I am still in, as I am going to school on 100% tuition assistance. I am slated to go to Cuba in May, and I am really looking forward to that, as I have never been anywhere for temporary duty. I also want to finish my upgrade training so that in case I stay in, I can either crosstrain or go to classes for more training. But what I also want to do is get my degree, and possibly have another baby. I adore children, and I'd love to be able to stay home(maybe work at night) with the kids, be a stay home Mommy, atleast during the day, and be there when the kids grow up.
Cadillac and I had a nice chat today. It's nice having a boss that's more human than asshole. Makes work a little more livable.
Scout and I sat for over 2 hours in the Navy hospital, waiting to get his prescription refilled. 2 hours.....for a doc to say,' Yes, he has ADHD, yes he needs his meds, no he's not losing weight, ok, here you go.' UGH. I hate government agencies for this. Patients must arrive early, be seen well past their appointment time, and then wait forever to get a bottle filled. And heaven forbid if you are late to that appointment, they won't see you at all then.
It was suggested to me, at one point by Other, that I ought to write a book. I have been giving this much thought, and the story is really starting to form in my head. Pretty soon I will have to put it on paper and see what happens.
They are calling for snow this week, and I am almost eager for it to come. Snow cripples this area, whereas I am used to driving in it, and having to go to work in it. I have much here at home that I really need to get a jump on and get done. So, yes, some time home from work wouldn't be a bad thing for me.
Ziggy and I have a couple friends who are expecting girls.....it makes me long to have another baby, but I know that it's not a good idea right now. But I'd love to have a little girl to put bows in her hair, frilly socks and Mary Jane shoes on......
Speaking of having another child, Cadillac and I were talking about my next 2 years in the military, as my contract is up in 2 years. Right now I have so many goals, that I am not sure how to compile them all so that they will mesh when I want them to. I want to get as much of my degree done as possible while I am still in, as I am going to school on 100% tuition assistance. I am slated to go to Cuba in May, and I am really looking forward to that, as I have never been anywhere for temporary duty. I also want to finish my upgrade training so that in case I stay in, I can either crosstrain or go to classes for more training. But what I also want to do is get my degree, and possibly have another baby. I adore children, and I'd love to be able to stay home(maybe work at night) with the kids, be a stay home Mommy, atleast during the day, and be there when the kids grow up.
Sunday, January 16, 2005
Over and done
I got an email from Other, stating he was tired of 'fooling around with this'. Gee, that speaks volumes, doesn't it? And he also says that we are both at fault because we won't budge. Well, atleast he finally spoke the truth, that I am nothing but a bother to him. So much for the line of crap that he loves me, soulmate, blase blase bullshit. I am impressed that he actually admitted that, he isn't one to do that.
Anyhow, long story quite short, I should be better off now. Hell, he almost had me believing that he was right, that he was my 'soulmate', destiny, all that. I'm not sure why I wanted his approval or friendship in the first place. Ziggy asked me about that, and I didn't have an answer. But he's right, no sense in being nice and attempting friendship with someone who is almost guaranteed to hurt you on a regular basis. I was fine prior to meeting him, there's no reason that I shouldn't be fine now.
Anyhow, long story quite short, I should be better off now. Hell, he almost had me believing that he was right, that he was my 'soulmate', destiny, all that. I'm not sure why I wanted his approval or friendship in the first place. Ziggy asked me about that, and I didn't have an answer. But he's right, no sense in being nice and attempting friendship with someone who is almost guaranteed to hurt you on a regular basis. I was fine prior to meeting him, there's no reason that I shouldn't be fine now.
I don't understand people, I guess
Here of late it seems like it is 'Dump on AFeskimo' day. Only the day tends to last for multiple ones.
Anyhow, I guess I don't understand something when it comes to talking to folks that are supposed to be friends. Or are almost friends, potential friends, etc. So I was talking to Other a couple nights ago, and we did a little walk down memory lane, talked over the one cosmic question that I had for him, and that was about it. Conversation ends with me thinking that it was a decent conversation, we didn't argue, which I was particularly proud of, and away I go on with my day. Apparently I was wrong. I got an email, that to sum up, basically said that he didn't want to talk about the cosmic question at all, that he should have ended that then, but that he doesn't like the way I portray him here on my blog. Ok, first off, read the print below the name of the blog. I'm not apologizing for myself or my mind on this one, sorry. What gets written is what's in my head. Got issues with that? Then don't read it. Plain and simple.
Perhaps I am naive. It wouldn't be the first time I have been so. Perhaps I am too trusting in those around me. I have always been guilty of that. I care too much, I guess. But, in my deciding on whether to communicate with Other any more, I had the above mentioned conversation with him. This was probably a bad move by me, to mention what I was thinking. Bad on AFeskimo. So the email kind of broad-sided me. But now that I think about it, Other has always made me feel as though I were in the wrong constantly with him, and that his communication with me is because I bug him into replying. Other, if you're reading this, this is the way it has always been, I've never said anything to you about it. That everything I think is inferior to him, I would never be a friend to him (though I did get the exhalted compliment that I had the potential of being a friend), and in order for us to get along, I would have to change everything about me to fit in with him. Tears come as I write this, because the one thing I always had impressed on me as a child is apparently true....I will never be good enough. Mediocre at best, but never above what I am, no matter how I try, even to the person who is supposedly my perfect match in this world. I have tried, most of my life, to be what was good enough for those around me. All I ever wanted was to be told I was doing well, that I was loved regardless of how or what I did. I see now that it will never come. My drive has always stemmed from the need to feel like I was good enough, and I realize now that for Other, I never will be.
Ziggy made a very good point. If Other really wanted my friendship, he wouldn't consistently bring me pain in the experience by throwing things at me and demanding that I conform to him. It makes alot of sense. Why should my potential friendship with Other always bring me pain? I try to treat him as a good friend, and I keep getting shit on, and by his own doing. Not the mark of a friend.
And in the end, I think that all that truly matters is that I am good enough, as I am, for Ziggy, Scout and MiniZiggy.
Anyhow, I guess I don't understand something when it comes to talking to folks that are supposed to be friends. Or are almost friends, potential friends, etc. So I was talking to Other a couple nights ago, and we did a little walk down memory lane, talked over the one cosmic question that I had for him, and that was about it. Conversation ends with me thinking that it was a decent conversation, we didn't argue, which I was particularly proud of, and away I go on with my day. Apparently I was wrong. I got an email, that to sum up, basically said that he didn't want to talk about the cosmic question at all, that he should have ended that then, but that he doesn't like the way I portray him here on my blog. Ok, first off, read the print below the name of the blog. I'm not apologizing for myself or my mind on this one, sorry. What gets written is what's in my head. Got issues with that? Then don't read it. Plain and simple.
Perhaps I am naive. It wouldn't be the first time I have been so. Perhaps I am too trusting in those around me. I have always been guilty of that. I care too much, I guess. But, in my deciding on whether to communicate with Other any more, I had the above mentioned conversation with him. This was probably a bad move by me, to mention what I was thinking. Bad on AFeskimo. So the email kind of broad-sided me. But now that I think about it, Other has always made me feel as though I were in the wrong constantly with him, and that his communication with me is because I bug him into replying. Other, if you're reading this, this is the way it has always been, I've never said anything to you about it. That everything I think is inferior to him, I would never be a friend to him (though I did get the exhalted compliment that I had the potential of being a friend), and in order for us to get along, I would have to change everything about me to fit in with him. Tears come as I write this, because the one thing I always had impressed on me as a child is apparently true....I will never be good enough. Mediocre at best, but never above what I am, no matter how I try, even to the person who is supposedly my perfect match in this world. I have tried, most of my life, to be what was good enough for those around me. All I ever wanted was to be told I was doing well, that I was loved regardless of how or what I did. I see now that it will never come. My drive has always stemmed from the need to feel like I was good enough, and I realize now that for Other, I never will be.
Ziggy made a very good point. If Other really wanted my friendship, he wouldn't consistently bring me pain in the experience by throwing things at me and demanding that I conform to him. It makes alot of sense. Why should my potential friendship with Other always bring me pain? I try to treat him as a good friend, and I keep getting shit on, and by his own doing. Not the mark of a friend.
And in the end, I think that all that truly matters is that I am good enough, as I am, for Ziggy, Scout and MiniZiggy.
Saturday, January 15, 2005
Update on weekend
Well, Ziggy seems to be feeling a touch better. I got him out of the house today, and pumped him with Gatorade to get him rehydrated, and he seems a bit better. I hope he gets better and not worse, as I really don't want to have to take him to the hospital if I can get him better at home.
MiniZiggy's cold seems to be getting a little worse. His chest is rattling a bit when he breathes. Little booger has been eating like a champ, though. I started feeding him pears today, and it was a whole new world for him. He ate 3 jars of them today, one at each sitting! I was floored!! I guess bananas just aren't his thing, but he loved those pears!!!!
I finished my first paper in my Psychology class, and was that ever a whopper!! This class is going to be rough, I can already tell. I am going to have to stay on my toes to get a good grade in this class. But, I have to take this in order to get my degree, so I might as well make a decent grade.
I bought a couple gallons of paint today, one for the dining room, and one for the stairway, in case I feel massively motivated to paint. I have the colors picked out for Scout's room and the computer room, but I haven't bought the paint yet. I am trying to get one part or room done a weekend, so I'm not dragging out getting the house painted. It's alot of work, but I am enjoying it a lot.
Well, I had better go be the hydration police and get Ziggy back into the Gatorade.
Oh, and if Jenn reads this (she'll know who she is), hang in there girl. Life sucks right now, but if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger. Chin up, it will all get better......
MiniZiggy's cold seems to be getting a little worse. His chest is rattling a bit when he breathes. Little booger has been eating like a champ, though. I started feeding him pears today, and it was a whole new world for him. He ate 3 jars of them today, one at each sitting! I was floored!! I guess bananas just aren't his thing, but he loved those pears!!!!
I finished my first paper in my Psychology class, and was that ever a whopper!! This class is going to be rough, I can already tell. I am going to have to stay on my toes to get a good grade in this class. But, I have to take this in order to get my degree, so I might as well make a decent grade.
I bought a couple gallons of paint today, one for the dining room, and one for the stairway, in case I feel massively motivated to paint. I have the colors picked out for Scout's room and the computer room, but I haven't bought the paint yet. I am trying to get one part or room done a weekend, so I'm not dragging out getting the house painted. It's alot of work, but I am enjoying it a lot.
Well, I had better go be the hydration police and get Ziggy back into the Gatorade.
Oh, and if Jenn reads this (she'll know who she is), hang in there girl. Life sucks right now, but if it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger. Chin up, it will all get better......
A lazy weekend
Well, I was hoping for a nice lazy weekend. No such luck so far. Ziggy has food poisioning from some nasty lasagna that we ate. I had it too, but I didn't eat any more of the lasagna, Ziggy did. So, he spent the better part of last night in the bathroom, being sick. I felt so bad for him.
We watched The Village last night with some friends. Good flick.
So, I started my homework for the Pysch class I am taking. Good grief, this class is going to be hell, I can see it already. Every week we have to write a paper. I am not the world's greatest Pysch student, either. I can write papers, but Pysch has never been my strong point. This is going to be a rough semester.
Well, I have much to do for the day, so I'd better get a move on......
I'll post more later.
We watched The Village last night with some friends. Good flick.
So, I started my homework for the Pysch class I am taking. Good grief, this class is going to be hell, I can see it already. Every week we have to write a paper. I am not the world's greatest Pysch student, either. I can write papers, but Pysch has never been my strong point. This is going to be a rough semester.
Well, I have much to do for the day, so I'd better get a move on......
I'll post more later.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
Sleepless night
It is almost 1 AM on Thursday, and I haven't been to bed yet. This is a bad thing, as I have to go to work in a few short hours. I was hoping that the exercise that has Ziggy and I working 12 hours shifts would be over tonight, but I don't think that's going to happen. So, I am up for the long haul, I figure. 3 hours and 15 minutes to go. Atleast until I have to get a move on to work.
You know, there are times when I feel like I am a part of no one's little group. To include Ziggy. I guess I take for granted that I am the only person he ever talks to during the day. That's my fault, I guess. I am too naive sometimes. Here lately I have felt more isolated from those around me, and I can't explain why. Like I'm just not wanted or welcome much of anywhere.
MiniZiggy has a cold, and I am wondering if it isn't getting worse. I was trying to burp him earlier, and he started to burp, then he coughed and then went into coughing like he was going to vomit, and all he got up was a little bit of phlegm. Poor baby, I felt bad for him. He had this look on his face as though he was asking what was happening to him. I may have to take him to the doctor if it keeps up.
Mine and Ziggy's first wedding anniversary is this coming Monday. It's hard to believe that a year has passed. So much has happened. Moving, having a baby, travelling to visit family, buying a house. It's been a rather full year. Well, here's hoping that the next year will be more good than bad, more happy than sad, and lots of love and laughter along the way.
You know, there are times when I feel like I am a part of no one's little group. To include Ziggy. I guess I take for granted that I am the only person he ever talks to during the day. That's my fault, I guess. I am too naive sometimes. Here lately I have felt more isolated from those around me, and I can't explain why. Like I'm just not wanted or welcome much of anywhere.
MiniZiggy has a cold, and I am wondering if it isn't getting worse. I was trying to burp him earlier, and he started to burp, then he coughed and then went into coughing like he was going to vomit, and all he got up was a little bit of phlegm. Poor baby, I felt bad for him. He had this look on his face as though he was asking what was happening to him. I may have to take him to the doctor if it keeps up.
Mine and Ziggy's first wedding anniversary is this coming Monday. It's hard to believe that a year has passed. So much has happened. Moving, having a baby, travelling to visit family, buying a house. It's been a rather full year. Well, here's hoping that the next year will be more good than bad, more happy than sad, and lots of love and laughter along the way.
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
I am so tired
These 12 hour shifts are killing me, I am getting WAY too old for this. Up at 4, and not in bed until after 10 is just hell on the 'ol ticker.
So I am trying to type a feedback for my boss. Cadillac wants me to write it on myself, and then give him my expectations of him as a boss. How about this, 'Don't be an asshole!' That pretty well covers it........or don't be my last boss, that one covers WAY more ground. Anyways, I'm typing along, almost done, and the idiot gear kicks in, I hit the 'Back' button on the browser, rather than the 'Previous' button in the application, and I lost everything I'd painstakingly typed. Go me, I am wonderful.
On a happy note, Friday is a Down Day, meaning NO WORK!!!!!!! Also, Monday is a holiday, so NO WORK!!!!! Also, Monday is mine and Ziggy's first wedding anniversary. I can't believe a year has gone by this quickly. I can say it's been a busy, but happy first year. Much better than my first marriage.
Well, I am going to head off of here for the night......
So I am trying to type a feedback for my boss. Cadillac wants me to write it on myself, and then give him my expectations of him as a boss. How about this, 'Don't be an asshole!' That pretty well covers it........or don't be my last boss, that one covers WAY more ground. Anyways, I'm typing along, almost done, and the idiot gear kicks in, I hit the 'Back' button on the browser, rather than the 'Previous' button in the application, and I lost everything I'd painstakingly typed. Go me, I am wonderful.
On a happy note, Friday is a Down Day, meaning NO WORK!!!!!!! Also, Monday is a holiday, so NO WORK!!!!! Also, Monday is mine and Ziggy's first wedding anniversary. I can't believe a year has gone by this quickly. I can say it's been a busy, but happy first year. Much better than my first marriage.
Well, I am going to head off of here for the night......
Other people
I post on a board pretty regularly. So why does everyone like to run me down? It has always been this way, and not just on the 'net. My day-to-day life tends that way as well. What am I? Everyone's boot mat, or so it seems. I'm not good at comebacks, and I am slow with them as well. I think they want to run me off the board, as I don't kiss anyone's ass, and I say what I think, whether they like it or not. I don't know.....
Monday, January 10, 2005
First day of a long week
Yea, so I was up at 4:00 this morning, getting ready for the madness that is my Monday this week. I managed to get to the daycare center with MiniZiggy at about 5:35, and managed to squeal into work at 6:00 on the nose. I was already tired by that time. I swear, I am getting too old for this!!! Work wasn't too bad, just very long, as 12 hour shifts tend to be. My day came to a screeching halt (yea, right, a halt) when 6:00 PM rolled around, and Ziggy was nowhere in sight with the kids. So I started a mild panic. Well, he finally got to the shop, and we swapped kids and I tore off down the highway to get Scout to, well, Scouts. I got home with MiniZiggy and vegged for about an hour, then it was off to get Scout and bring him home.
So, it's currently 8:41 PM, and Scout is eating dinner made in a crock pot, I am typing this, along with talking to Ziggy via email, and trying to study for my Child Psychology class that's online. I already feel behind. People have been posting in that message board for 3 days, and here I am, coming along on the day the class is supposed to start!!! I am always behind, it seems.
So, it's currently 8:41 PM, and Scout is eating dinner made in a crock pot, I am typing this, along with talking to Ziggy via email, and trying to study for my Child Psychology class that's online. I already feel behind. People have been posting in that message board for 3 days, and here I am, coming along on the day the class is supposed to start!!! I am always behind, it seems.
Sunday, January 09, 2005
Ramble
So I got Scout's bathroom painted. Only to find out how cheap the ceiling paint was when I pulled the tape up. You know, that blue painter's tape that isn't supposed to pull up the paint? Yea, well, it pulled up a bunch of the ceiling pain in Scout's bathroom. So, since I now have the bathroom painted, why doesn't the color go with the tiles like it did when I was picking the color out in the first place? Oh well, it's staying this color for a while.
Tomorrow begins 3 days of a long week. Long because it's an exercise week. Meaning some of the folks I work with will be playing war, and those of us not playing have to work 12-hour shifts. So, I start 6AM tomorrow morning. It's already a long day, and it hasn't gotten here yet.
I mentioned to Ziggy that he ought to go see that female friend of his back home. All he said was 'Why?' I sort of thought he'd want to go see her, since he's known her for years, been friends with the family since he was little, all that. Guess I was mistaken. Oh well, I made the offer.
Classes start Monday, and I am starting to think that the exercise is going to seriously hinder my first week. I've never taken online classes before, so this will be a new experience. I am going to try to CLEP test out of Anatomy & Phisiology, as I really don't want to have to take it again. I also want to get out of taking Chemistry, if I can. Chem was not my best class, and never has been. So I try to avoid it at all costs. I want to get as much of my degree done with so that I can apply to go to college full time for a year, and still be on active duty. I want my degree before this contract is up, and I have a little over 2 years left.
I can hardly wait for our next pay day so I can do our taxes and pay off some bills. I will also be looking into LASIX eye surgery as well.
Tomorrow begins 3 days of a long week. Long because it's an exercise week. Meaning some of the folks I work with will be playing war, and those of us not playing have to work 12-hour shifts. So, I start 6AM tomorrow morning. It's already a long day, and it hasn't gotten here yet.
I mentioned to Ziggy that he ought to go see that female friend of his back home. All he said was 'Why?' I sort of thought he'd want to go see her, since he's known her for years, been friends with the family since he was little, all that. Guess I was mistaken. Oh well, I made the offer.
Classes start Monday, and I am starting to think that the exercise is going to seriously hinder my first week. I've never taken online classes before, so this will be a new experience. I am going to try to CLEP test out of Anatomy & Phisiology, as I really don't want to have to take it again. I also want to get out of taking Chemistry, if I can. Chem was not my best class, and never has been. So I try to avoid it at all costs. I want to get as much of my degree done with so that I can apply to go to college full time for a year, and still be on active duty. I want my degree before this contract is up, and I have a little over 2 years left.
I can hardly wait for our next pay day so I can do our taxes and pay off some bills. I will also be looking into LASIX eye surgery as well.
Saturday, January 08, 2005
Victoria's Secret and paint.......
Scout's bathroom has the first coat on it. One more ought to do it.
Alright men.........If you are in a Victoria's Secret store (especially during the Semi-Annual Sale that's going on right now) and you have to ask WHY women buy underwear from there, then there is a problem. If that has to be explained, then you've been under a rock for, oh say, a good 50 years. That's like asking why men look at Maxim, Stuff or Playboy - it's rather obvious, and IT AIN'T THE ARTICLES!!!!! Clues, men....get one or get outta the damned store for crying out loud!!!!!
Alright men.........If you are in a Victoria's Secret store (especially during the Semi-Annual Sale that's going on right now) and you have to ask WHY women buy underwear from there, then there is a problem. If that has to be explained, then you've been under a rock for, oh say, a good 50 years. That's like asking why men look at Maxim, Stuff or Playboy - it's rather obvious, and IT AIN'T THE ARTICLES!!!!! Clues, men....get one or get outta the damned store for crying out loud!!!!!
Friday, January 07, 2005
Weekend finally....
So why do I spend it cleaning, instead of relaxing? There's an excellent question. Well, my house in Alaska, that was on base, stayed pretty messy. I guess I don't want this one (that we are paying for, so I guess we 'own' it) to be the same way. I never saw myself as a homeowner, and now that I am, I am going all Martha Stewart on Ziggy. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am not the decorator type. Martha didn't marry Ziggy. So now that we have a house that we own, I am painting the walls, buying blinds for the windows, planning what curtains I want, and if I want to make them myself or not. I even bought a poinsettia plant for the front door at Christmas. I'm starting to scare the people that know me best - I painted my half bath pink. And I'm not a person who loves pink. So, I am planning on schlopping paint on Scout's bathroom walls this weekend. I have decided that the decor in his bathroom will be all things Beach. The curtain has a lovely beach scene on it, the rug has fish, and I think a few seashells would go ok with it all. And the walls are going to be 'Adriatic Mist' from Home Depot.
I have massive plans for the closets in the house as well. I am going to get shelves and drawers and such from Home Depot and make the closets all organized, rather than have alot of wasted space. The one in the computer room will have storage space for craft and sewing things. I can hardly wait!!!
Ziggy is planning to take MiniZiggy to Washington State with him for a few days to see that side of the family, since they can't make it out here to see us. I am going to mention to Ziggy that he ought to go see an old friend of his that he was romantically attached to at one point. I'm not sure what to call her. But I have been very jealous of this person, as Ziggy has been of Other, and I am really starting to think that I have been mistaken in my jealousy. He did marry ME, after all, right? So why was I getting all bent out of shape about this woman? I guess I figured that she was what he had wanted at one point, and that he'd still want that, and I wouldn't be that person for him. Childish, I know, but hey, we all grow and go through things like that.
I have massive plans for the closets in the house as well. I am going to get shelves and drawers and such from Home Depot and make the closets all organized, rather than have alot of wasted space. The one in the computer room will have storage space for craft and sewing things. I can hardly wait!!!
Ziggy is planning to take MiniZiggy to Washington State with him for a few days to see that side of the family, since they can't make it out here to see us. I am going to mention to Ziggy that he ought to go see an old friend of his that he was romantically attached to at one point. I'm not sure what to call her. But I have been very jealous of this person, as Ziggy has been of Other, and I am really starting to think that I have been mistaken in my jealousy. He did marry ME, after all, right? So why was I getting all bent out of shape about this woman? I guess I figured that she was what he had wanted at one point, and that he'd still want that, and I wouldn't be that person for him. Childish, I know, but hey, we all grow and go through things like that.
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
My book
I have always wanted to be a writer, ever since I was a child. I won writing fairs, contests, and was even published a time or two in the paper of my hometown. Also, with my mind running at the rate that tends to, it was suggested that I write a book of my life, or atleast what happens in my head. One of these days I'll get around to it. I have a story to tell. Not totally true, but not totally made up, either. I ought to start writing it. May have to do that.
I just love my husband. Ziggy is so different from the man I was married to the first time, we'll call him Psycho. I lived in 3 years of mental illness, irresponsibility and chaos. Normal was not a word in my vocabulary. Then I divorced Pyscho and started living with Ziggy. And life took on a whole new light. Gone was the worry over money, over whether or not I'd come home to a suicide (which very nearly happened in my first marriage) or not. Gone was the worry that my baby(ok, he was 7 at the time) was going to be beaten by my husband. It was so refreshing to come home and have dinner, and sit in front of the tv and watch baseball. Or to go to the store without a battle. Or to be able to go to work and not be called by my husband and get yelled at that my co-worker(all male) were trying to steal me from him. So refreshing. I enjoyed learning what normal was. That was a little over a year ago. Ziggy asked me the other day if I was still loving normal, since I hadn't mentioned it lately. And a thought occurred to me. I've gotten used to the normal that is my life. Well, as normal as life married to and being a service member is. Scout with homework, a crying MiniZiggy, dogs eating the food on the counter, the dryer blitzing on me(which it does, I swear it's possessed) really isn't so bad when I think of what my life was before the stabilizing Ziggy came along.
Along with the thoughts of normal life come the what- if- I'd- done- the -other -life thoughts. Prior to my marriage to Ziggy, there was a man in my life whom meant a good bit to me, and with whom I was involved. To the point that this man proposed to me. We'll call him Other. Obviously, I didn't marry him, I married Ziggy. From time to time, I've heard from him, and the last time was bad. He started some stuff with Ziggy and that didn't make things at home very pleasant, and I can't say that my relationship to the Other has been the same. The times we've emailed, it's been about work, or about my boss, whom he knows. That bothers me for 2 reasons. One, I'd told Ziggy I wasn't speaking to him any longer. 2. I'm afraid that this mundane emailing will back fire on me again. So here I am at a crossroads. What do I do? I'll have to mull it over some more, I suppose.
I got a new boss today, and we'll call him Cadillac. He seems ok so far. Much better than my last boss, what was a total ass and then some. This one seems a bit more proactive. That's always a good thing.
I just love my husband. Ziggy is so different from the man I was married to the first time, we'll call him Psycho. I lived in 3 years of mental illness, irresponsibility and chaos. Normal was not a word in my vocabulary. Then I divorced Pyscho and started living with Ziggy. And life took on a whole new light. Gone was the worry over money, over whether or not I'd come home to a suicide (which very nearly happened in my first marriage) or not. Gone was the worry that my baby(ok, he was 7 at the time) was going to be beaten by my husband. It was so refreshing to come home and have dinner, and sit in front of the tv and watch baseball. Or to go to the store without a battle. Or to be able to go to work and not be called by my husband and get yelled at that my co-worker(all male) were trying to steal me from him. So refreshing. I enjoyed learning what normal was. That was a little over a year ago. Ziggy asked me the other day if I was still loving normal, since I hadn't mentioned it lately. And a thought occurred to me. I've gotten used to the normal that is my life. Well, as normal as life married to and being a service member is. Scout with homework, a crying MiniZiggy, dogs eating the food on the counter, the dryer blitzing on me(which it does, I swear it's possessed) really isn't so bad when I think of what my life was before the stabilizing Ziggy came along.
Along with the thoughts of normal life come the what- if- I'd- done- the -other -life thoughts. Prior to my marriage to Ziggy, there was a man in my life whom meant a good bit to me, and with whom I was involved. To the point that this man proposed to me. We'll call him Other. Obviously, I didn't marry him, I married Ziggy. From time to time, I've heard from him, and the last time was bad. He started some stuff with Ziggy and that didn't make things at home very pleasant, and I can't say that my relationship to the Other has been the same. The times we've emailed, it's been about work, or about my boss, whom he knows. That bothers me for 2 reasons. One, I'd told Ziggy I wasn't speaking to him any longer. 2. I'm afraid that this mundane emailing will back fire on me again. So here I am at a crossroads. What do I do? I'll have to mull it over some more, I suppose.
I got a new boss today, and we'll call him Cadillac. He seems ok so far. Much better than my last boss, what was a total ass and then some. This one seems a bit more proactive. That's always a good thing.
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AFeskimo and Ziggy
