Over my head

I think I am in over my head with school. I am trying, but I'm not sure it's working very well. My insurance job is going to have to go by the way side, and soon. This juggling crap is for the birds.

Probably selling my Jeep. Gotta start going through crap and getting rid of stuff and such. Need to start painting the walls in the casa. Ugh. All of this would go on while the holidays are on, right?

Whole, for a bit

I can't explain it, but I was all giggly and giddy last night. Felt good. Haven't felt completely whole in a LONG time. Not since before I had MiniMachine.......

Here we go again!!!!

We are moving. Again. This time, to Jolly Old England, a few hours' drive from London. YEY!!!!!! I can't wait!!!!!! We are supposed to report in February.....

More to follow, of course...

Oh wow!!

I got my grade back for my paper that I wrote for my Government class. I made a 9 out of 11, and my teacher said it was a good first paper!! WHHHHHEEEEEEWWW!!!!! That makes me feel MUCH better!

I wrote a mega-paper for my Mythology class, and it's 300 words shy of the minimum of 1800. Hopefully, that won't bite me too hard in the butt. I feel pretty confident about the Works Cited page, as I looked up all the formats on the internet, and copied the formats. Those are my nemesis, and I feel like I am improving when it comes to writing academic papers.

What a week

And it's only Monday. Got caught up in a couple classes for the week, got ahead in one, and trying to fix technical problems with the rest. It's enough to make me scream. Really loud.

So, off and running to another busy week. No rest for the weary, I swear, and little time for Ziggy. That's not good, as we rarely don't talk. But things have been really hectic, with no sign of slowing down any time soon.

Got some inside info on getting in with the government as far as being medical goes. Will have to look into it and see how it pans out.

Next semester, not taking 5 classes!!!

mmmmmm.............

I wrote my first paper for school. Yikes!! I am terrible at writing academic papers, and am terrified that if I miss something, I'll get in trouble for plagarism somehow. So I documented. Like crazy. EVERYTHING. I think. Crossing my fingers and toes, we'll see how it goes......

mmmmmmmm.........I just love how a glass of wine gives you this warm fuzzy comfortable feeling. Like laying in bed with a cup of cappuchino and a good book, or talking the night away with someone close to you. Mmmmmmmm............

Ok, night guys, I have to work tomorrow!!!

Me and my blog, and things I am saying

I had a coworker tell me that I give too much of myself away. And for whatever reason, that stuck with me. All day I had that kind of churning in the back of my mind. And I started looking at myself, and you know, it's true. I am a pretty giving person. Whether it's the shirt off my back or a piece of my mind, I give pretty freely of both. I know, I know, I gotta watch how much of my mind I give away, or I won't have much left.......anywhooo...

I admit, I have held back when it comes to some people in my life. People who have meant a good bit to me, and for whatever reason, I have reserved things from them. My mother, for example, about religion. I admit, I am chicken-shit when it comes to telling my mom where to get off. This is where Ziggy comes in handy. Ziggy can tell anyone off and not flinch, overthink it, or go from 0 to screaming in under 0.6 seconds. I soooo envy that ability. Like in the movie You've Got Mail, where Tom Hanks is telling Meg Ryan that he wished he could give her all of his zingers and she could be as bad as she wanted. I wish I could borrow that from Ziggy. I would have been at my mother with both barrells blazing yesterday, if I could have had the balls to let rip. Oh, I have more people, believe me.....

My ex-Marine..........yea, if I'd told him what was going on, things would've been very different.

Sadly enough, I put my friend Eunuch into this category. I love Eunuch to death. We have some common interests, and seem a good deal alike, and that may very well be our undoing as friends. Eunuch introduced me to hashing, educated me on beer(though I still am no beer drinker - not Eunuch's fault, either), and otherwise being a good friend with a shoulder to cry on occassionally. I have really enjoyed getting to know Eunuch, but am starting to wonder if the things I hold back from him aren't starting to get in the way a bit. Perhaps I have given too much of myself in a friendship. I have never been in a friendship that was as mutually nutured as my friendship with Eunuch. And yet I feel that perhaps, just maybe, it's just too good to be true that I could have a great friendship with a man without ruining it completely, as I am terribly good at doing. My best friend is not counting in this. I hold back certain parts of myself with Eunuch. I have from the outset. I am a stubborn person, to the core. I tend to not give an inch when it comes to arguments, with the exception of Ziggy. I don't give even a millimeter when it comes to Eunuch. Ziggy has even said he doesn't know if I should. I have always been the one to get walked all over in friendships, and in the last few years I have tried to reverse that trend. I now wonder if I'm not shooting myself in the foot, and should give Eunuch all that he has been asking for from me. It's a quandry, and an impasse as well, it seems.

So without giving details here, I unloaded all that about Eunuch and I. The details don't really matter, I don't think. On the other hand, if I give all that I have held back, thoughts and mmmm, actions, things could change in a way that I'm not willing to deal with.

Rather than end this post on a sad, pensive note, I will throw in some cheer. Speaking of my best friend, Chris Daugherty, I found out tonight that he is ENGAGED!!!!!!!! His girlfriend is great, I met her in April on the big drive from Washington. I think she's a little overwhelmed that I am so stoked for them (I'm a very exuberant person, if you haven't noticed), but hey, if she wasn't good for Chris, he wouldn't be with her. So YAY for Chris and Stephanie!!!!!!!

Well, it's official

We aren't moving to Germany. Since the medical clinic where we were going is closing, the Air Force opted to keep us at home. Atleast until they decide to send us somewhere else. We are back in the bucket of people to be selected to move. This doesn't really bother me, as long as it's not to Georgia or California.

My mother called yesterday, worried about Scout, because 'you hear so much on the news here(Georgia) about Buddhists getting arrested and violence. I know it's not right for him to believe that. I didn't raise you that way.' At which point, I hung up on her. I am beyond tired of hearing the same things over and over again from her. I have long since lost the patience for dealing with it.

School is running me ragged. I took on too much this semester, but I have to handle it now and get through the best that I can.

I took a second job, much steadier pay. I work in a diet clinic, giving shots, drawing blood. It's nice to be back in the field I loved. I am sure that I will be getting a lecture from my insurance manager, but I don't really care. He has nothing but negative to say most of the time as it is.

BTW, Happy Birthday to Eunuch! His 31st birthday is today!